I'm sorry you are feeling down right now. I think your husband may have a point about pretending for a few hours, if your kids enjoy the celebration. I know when you feel better you would be glad that the kids were able to enjoy the day. I know it won't be easy. I spent years trying to hide my depression from my daughter, especially on days like birthdays and holidays. It gave me good memories even though I didn't feel up to it at the time.

I'm sorry your parents read your diary. It must have been very hard to know that they did so behind your back. But try to forgive them because they did it out of love to protect you.