Iīm a 30+ year old woman and Iīm still a virgin. Thereīs nothing physically wrong and Iīve been having sex "by myself" since my teens. So far everything seems normal. I donīt have any religious or other hesitations that prevents me from take this step. I wasnīt sexually traumatized as a child.
I donīt really know how I got into this "situation", I was never interested in looking for a partner in my teens and not in my 20:s either. I thought about my situation being single from time to time but I never took the step to go online dating or so.
Now I sometimes feel unnormal because of this and even if I get aroused when looking at nice intimate sex in a movie for instance I donīt feel the urge to find someone and just have sex. I canīt really see myself in a relationship and I donīt fantasize about other people sexually.
Sometimes Iīve thought about the possibility me being asexual but as I never considered a relationship at all, not a plathonic one either, I think there could be other explanations to this that I donīt really know of.
I donīt want to live by myself for the rest of my life but I though find it hard imagining myself being in a relationship and what it would be like.
Of course I know of dating communities and so on and I canīt say I would be scared of dating but it doesnīt feel natural for some reason. As this is a therapy community Iīm not looking for dating tips.
I would want some reflections on this matter, perhaps thereīs someone else out there who shares this matter with me.
Sometimes this makes me really sad.