Commiserating.

Is there a certain super hot fantasy you can use? I find that helps me. Without hot fantasies, it can be very difficult if not impossible to have an orgasm.

I too used to find my sexuality a huge part of my personality. I used to be very good looking and quite seductive... now I am overweight and hemmed in by responsibilities and being "a good mother and good wife". (eyesroll grumble grumble - hee hee)

Meds making orgasms a lot more difficult has changed my sex life in huge ways. I had to change the way I expressed my sexuality and how I shared my sexuality with my partner. For me (TMI alert so avert your gaze if it makes you uncomfortable) an industrial vibrator is necessary and I use it with my partner because that's the ONLY way I can get off with him. It's kind of sad because I used to come with penetration ALL THE TIME. Eventually I came to accept these changes... not to like them... but accept them. And try to figure out how to make things hot/hotter for myself and with my partner. I haven't figured it all out yet though. I think it involves a kind of going back to puberty where you have to explore yourself and find out what works for you. Because you are a different "you" now than you were.

Best wishes on your journey.