Hi everyone, this is my first post on this site. I genuinely appreciate anyone taking the time out of their day to read this. I searched for a mental health forum because I needed answers, support, help, and maybe some assurance I'm going to be alright. I am a 16 year old girl, and I have known for years that I am not in the best mental state. When I was about 12, my issues centered around body image. Looking at myself in the mirror evoked immense anger, and i'd often be so angered simply from my own appearance that i'd self harm. I'd go through periods of starving myself, and this behavior continued until I was about 14. At age 14, I developed some hormonal issues. I stopped getting my period, and started taking birth control and other hormone pills to correct the issue. However, the pills didn't work well with me, and they only made my health decline even further. I eventually stopped taking all pills, but now only get about 3-4 periods per year. It was at this age when I also began having anxiety attacks. The attacks were terrifying, I couldn't breathe, and it felt like I was in a dream, disconnected from reality. At about age 14/15, my issues seemed to center solely around sadness. The sadness was crippling, and that was when I really began to question my existence. Now, at age 16, I haven't had an anxiety attack in almost a year, but I've felt incredibly out of it for the last few weeks. I feel so weird, and wrong and disconnected. Like i'm not really here. One second i'll be fine, and the next it's almost like I can feel my mood decline. I can feel the highs and lows in my emotions. I'll be so upset that it will hurt and i'll be bawling, then within 15 minutes or so i'll be ecstatic. I often feel sped up, or slowed down. I just don't feel like myself lately. I have some family members with bipolar disorder, which is why I began to question if I had it myself. I'm very rash lately, making weird decisions, and overall, I just don't feel like i'm here. I'm sick of feeling this way. I just want to feel normal. Approaching my parents doesn't seem to work very well. They aren't really the type that believe in mental illnesses, and they especially don't believe their daughter would have one. Does anyone have any advice for me? This disconnected, weird feeling is just intolerable. I can't stand the vicious shifts in my mood. I can feel the highs and lows and I'm just frustrated.

Thank you.