I suffer from frequent mood swings since high school (I'm 20 now).
When I'm feeling down I have all the symptoms of clinial depression, suicidal thoughts included, and I fear I might give in to those if I have a very bad episode and I happen to be alone.
When I'm feeling up it's like hypomania, not mania. I feel like I am perfectly mentally healthy, I think I can now move on with my life and achieve things I want, no sad thoughts at all. I feel full of energy and optimism.
I also feel normal a lot of the time. Most of the time I'm depressed though.

But the thing is those episodes are way too short to diagnose bipolar, according to the DSM book. My doctor said he doesn't want to diagnose me yet, that it's too early and we have to first see how I react to meds (escifulopram, probably because I also have OCD and frequent anxiety). So far (2nd day) I don't think they do anything. They might have weakened the OCD but this might be placebo since they supposedly take at least aweek to kick in.
Right now I am going up on the swing, to the normal mood level I think. Still somewhat sad but I don't feel like crying any more. I feel like acting. I think I'll start writing a blog on PC. I enjoy writing about how I feel it really does make me feel better.

My episodes of altered mood usually take 2-4 hours.
I'd say my mood is roughly 30 % of the time normal, 50 % depressed and 20 % hypomanic. I would not say it's manic, since I've read it is a much stronger state than what I experience.

My morning was great today.
Woke up feeling like a king of the world. I could hear music in my ears. Not as an auditory hallucination, just imagining beatiful music.
I broke down 3 hours later. Cried. Felt hopeless. Now I'm coming back to normal.

Is it possible that I am somehow bipolar ?
My doctor didn't diagnose me yet.

If I am, how can I deal with it ? Does anyone here know escifulopram ? This mental state has ruined my life. It went from pretty good to terrible, I feel like I have no future.