I know answers to most of these as I have asked them before. All thought i do enjoy getting different opinions on something so i have a deeper understanding. It is also on my mind and i want to just get it out there.

My T says that i created a persona growing up. This person who isn't who i really am and i present this person when i first meet people. This person is kind, energetic, funny and charming.

She keeps telling me to be myself, she says being angry is a good thing and expressing anger is helpful. She says that you need to express it appropriately though. She says that the real me, is this quiet type who wants to be left alone to do his own thing. She described me as abstract sequential.

She said by keeping this "persona" when i try to date i put people off. Then first get to know this fun charming energetic guy, then eventually i fall off into a quiet submissive don't wanna talk person.

She says its ok to be both. She says it shows good and bad qualities. its just she said showing too much of one and not the other is the problem because the other person isn't ready for it when the other side shows. or the other person gets too much negativity and it really brings them down.

So my question is.

What does she mean by an equal balance of good and bad?

She gave an example. "Like when you bring a girl over for a movie you can hang out with her, but when the movie is over go and find some alone time. If she asks to talk to her and wants more attention, tell her that you just want some alone time right now."

I dont know if i could do something like that i would feel uneasy. I mean if i am bringing someone over my house then i was raised to kinda give them my undivided attention while they are a guest. Anyway i would like some weighed in thoughts here.