When I quit I just quit. AA isn't for everyone so don't be concerned with that. You aren't alone in that feeling. I have bipolar as well and I understand to an extent about the manic binges. I have never been manic only hypo so I only know of lowered inhibitions. I have found I thought of those times as a get out of jail free card but now I'm just making sure I have creative outlets for those times. Just don't drink. Just don't have the first one. Just focus on living vs not drinking. That's my little mantra.