Rape doesn't have to ruin your chances of having a happy marriage and having children. There are plenty of women who've done it. Please don't worry about that part of your future.

I appreciate the importance of religion to you, but it's difficult for me to believe that any religion would equate rape with sex outside of marriage. You weren't in control of the situation. That's not the same as choosing to have sex outside of marriage. Do you have a religious leader or someone who follows your religion whom you trust? You might talk to him or her about that to soothe your concerns about it.

I think therapy is definitely a good idea. The sooner, the better. I know, though, that getting therapy is problematic when insurance won't pay for it and you can't afford it. I would recommend that you check what your insurance says about getting therapy. With my insurance, for instance, if my PCP recommends it then the insurance will cover it. You'd have to share this experience (not the details, though, at least I don't think) with your PCP, but if that will cover therapy sessions then it might be worth it. This is a traumatic experience and a trauma therapist would be the best choice, if you can find one that your insurance covers.

If you really can't get the help of a therapist then I recommend you search on Amazon or at your local library for books on healing from rape. RAINN is also an excellent organization. They have a hotline and other resources on their website.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that your concerns about the future are understandable, but if you take care of yourself now (i.e., healing), the future will take care of itself.