Quote:
Originally Posted by breakmystride
This past Spring, I nearly had to go inpatient because I was severely underweight. Because of financial issues, I went into an outpatient program instead, and left the program before I was fully weight restored. But I've nearly doubled my weight in the past seven or eight months, and now I'm actually overweight. I've gone through periods of overeating, but I've also lapsed into restrictive habits for short periods of time without losing any weight. I'm scared that now, because the damage my eating disorder did to my metabolism and just my overall attitude towards food, I'm going to be overweight for the rest of my life.
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I understand what you're saying.
When I was a teen, I developed an ED. I restricted heavily, lost a lot of weight and ended up underweight for quite some time. I was in a difficult situation then, that meant it went unnoticed by anyone who would've helped me. I then became free of that situation and met someone. They encouraged me to eat more. I took to it better than I thought, probably because although initially starving myself was my choice, it ended up not being my choice so to have the option of food in a safe environment made me feel good, although I continued to struggle with guilt and body image. I gained weight and was a healthy weight. I then fell pregnant and went a bit mad with food, gained loads and was overweight eventually. My MH problems crept in, I became agoraphobic, I would comfort eat. I ended up what they call 'morbidly obese' for years. I just couldn't adopt a healthy mindset with food and eating. I eventually joined a weight loss group (a very well known one, not sure if I'm allowed to say who) which promoted healthy eating but not so much any idea of healthy portion sizes. I lost weight, a lot of weight and felt much better. If I'd have carried on, and perhaps learnt what a healthy portion size was, I have no doubt in my mind I'd have got to a healthy weight in a healthy way, so it can be done. Don't lose hope. Can you get help with your relationship with food? The simple bit is eating healthy stuff, the hard bit is changing how you think and feel towards food. And also how you think and feel about yourself, what you use to cope with how you feel, it all ties in and is probably better dealt with with professional help. That's what I missed out on and I wish I hadn't.
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