I don't think you were out of line at all. Getting angry is natural, its a valid human emotion, and sounds like your anger was justified. Your mom just doesn't know when to quit.


I hate getting into arguments with my mother too, but that's because I have a quick temper and a tongue that spits vitriol without warning....


So I always feel like a right b!tch if we do get into an argument, thankfully, that rarely happens.


The reason I share that not so nice characteristic about myself is this...


If I were in your shoes, I would respond like this in future;


"Mom, honestly, how would you feel if we kept telling you that you should've stayed with dad?"


If she's receptive and now understands the affects of her words?.... Amicable end of story.


If she insists on being unreasonable?


Different story, then I would assure her I would bring up my father everytime she brought up an ex.

Giver her a taste of her own medicine until she cuts that shyt out.

(I've actually had to have a conversation like that with my mom in the past, but on a completely unrelated topic, and she had the good sense to drop the subject forever )


Buuut, that's just me, I obviously don't understand your family dynamics etc...


So sorry your mom seems to be living in lalaland, that cannot be easy for your family.