I think "testing" is a very common in therapy and you also make this "tests" outside therapy with people you meet and want to create some kind of bond with. It could be a new friend or a partner. The testing is then perhaps less intense compared to testing a T.

I test a T from the beginning and I try to find out how far they are willing to go to adapt to what I need in therapy. Unfortunately my former T who terminated me was one of those T:s who couldn´t cope with me testing her.

Everything was fine when I said nice things about her skills and her behaviour towards me in therapy but when I was disappointed about a few things, she terminated me.

But I still think testing is the right thing to do as long as you don´t violate boundaries, for example making a lot of calls to a T:s private phone or something like that. A T who can´t tolerate testing, is a T you shouldn´t see anymore.

I have had some e-mail contact with a new potential T and asked her questions like if she wanted to see me after I´d told her about the termination earlier on. But I asked this in a much less direct way just to see if she´d pick up my question and how eager she is to have me as her client.