I would take the words literally...Doesn't know what's going on in your relationship, Doesn't think you can see what love he is capable of giving, Doesn't think you hear what he says, He finds you vigorous and animated; however, can't relate to you, thinks you don't see what's important to him.

It is a lot of what I was feeling towards my wife before she became my ex.

I struggle with this. In a lot of ways this could be a good starting point for marriage counseling. Based on what you've described over the past month...this is the first sign of some kind of reflection on the relationship from him. Though incomplete...What do each of you want from the marriage and each other. Although there is so much blame and responsibility pushed your way...If you want this to work...somehow you will need to both acknowledge things done wrong, sincerely apologize for the action, and forgive one another. (Tougher for you to forgive I would think considering trust has been breached). I don't know that he would be able to own his half of the gap? Both of your needs are not being met - can he accept that you could probably write the same words about him?

Final thoughts:

I'm glad that you have some prep work happening. I really do think it essential in all this.

I think he is projecting his emotions on to you about the bad attitude or he is not accepting his part in this.

I would watch the pretending everything is all right that you are doing. It's time to be assertive (no doormat and no aggressiveness) regarding the realities of your marriage with him.

Wishing you the best...