I don't know what is wrong with me. The lady I see at the mental health service thing has no idea. I don't feel 'bad' enough to fit into the categories of certain disorders and what not.

I have anxiety. But whilst I think it's bad and it does interfere with my life, I wouldn't say I had an anxiety disorder. And my (lets call her my therapist) doesn't give me the chance to explain anything regarding anxiety, so in terms of her helping me, that's not going anywhere soon.

My therapist said I am showing signs of Aspergers Syndrome and so I've done an assessment and I'm getting the report back on Friday 23rd.

I show signs of depression. I self harm and constantly think about suicide - I think about it, but it doesn't mean I would. Though I feel as though because I know I would never attempt to take my own life and my therapist knows that, she isn't treating the thoughts or wanting to seriously.

To put it into perspective; I attempted to take my own life in 2011 and after that, I was put on the mental health service's radar and was seeing a Clinical Child Psychologist. I then, after about 8 months of seeing her, said that I knew I wouldn't try again but I still wanted to etc. I'm now seeing a Community Nurse.

So I don't know what is wrong with me, I know something is and I'm not the kind of person to 'just get better' without having a name to whatever it is. I hate being in the middle.. it's either something is there or nothing is.

I feel like I've missed so many chances at expressing how I actually feel. I had an assessment for depression about a year ago, was told I was just a teenager but in that session, I wasn't given a chance to actually explain how I felt. I just got the basic "hows your appetite?" "hows your sleep" "hows your concentration" etc (and for the record, all of those answers would be "bad"). I answered those and then she said there was nothing wrong.

I feel so lost. It feels like no one is listening to me or giving me the chance to properly explain and also like I'm not being taken seriously. It's so frustrating and upsetting and makes me not want to leave the house or try to do anything any more.

(And I think this is in the wrong forum, so I'm sorry about that. I forgot to check before I submitted the post.)