Thanks Wander. Well I dont know next time I see the meds pdoc I piked out on yesterday, it depends when I make another appointment. T/pdoc is away another week and a half I think. I have an appointment with a GP at some stage this week. The bruising from the kick is pretty severe and I've had a lot of non related pain issues (hence the weed use). I can ring meds pdoc anytime I want really, he may not be able to see me for a while but usually they can admit me if need be on the day. I dont think I want to go down that road.

I hate going to hospital, it takes me so long to get back into real life at home and I start uni next month. Im currently seeing everything as a suicide tool. I wont go in the kitchen or touch anything in the bathroom, I move between my bed and the couch and that is it as that is safe. If I had a friend with me today they would probably convince me, but they all have lives to deal with and dont want some suicidal chick ringing them on their lunch break where there is nothing they can do.