I applied for a job a few weeks ago, I was hoping that I could wing my way through but now I've seen all the preparation I'll have to do, I just can't. It is too long since I did any serious statistical stuff and I haven't the concentration or cognitive functioning to refresh my knowledge.

I finally got the online testing app working, I'll probably do the online test for the experience as it is fairly straightforward. But I don't see the point in putting myself through another round of testing and an interview when there will be people who know what they are talking about and who have recent experience to draw upon and who probably won't be being weighed down by depression either.

I feel like such a loser giving up like this, I'm not a great starter (low motivation) but I usually see things through if I actually get started, not this time though. I was feeling really down before this, now I feel worse, serves me right for making the cardinal error of letting a chink of hope penetrate my brain. I dared to hope that this would be a fresh start for me.