I know many consider a diagnosis a label, but sometimes it can be helpful. The problem with self-diagnosing is you could be wrong. Then again, so could the doctors

You think you might have bipolar, but the symptoms you listed are criteria for many diagnoses. Everything you described I can relate to, but I don't have bipolar; I have BPD. It could also be some sort of ptsd, generalized anxiety, atypical depression, or a combination. How to tell the difference? The combination of symptoms and the cause/onset.

If you struggle with opening up with your T, maybe you can try writing or drawing? Writing has helped me, and I kniw a lot of people here find art a great way to express themselves.