I think the five year old is part of you and has to be part of your whole equation or there's no way it can come out "right." If you think of a math equation, if you leave out a number, the other person you ask to "solve" the equation can't because they don't have all the information!

Why not write your T a "note" and tell her you're missing her, a "P.S. I miss you" sort of thing? There's nothing sappy about that and it might indeed make the "missing" difference in the reply your T gives you! If you want your "whole" T, you have to give her your whole truth. I made up a saying for myself I use on myself, "The truth is true, whether you like it or not." :-)