i completely understand this and so agree it is from the bipolar. i was a rapid cycler and was pretty much on a fixed schedule to where i may have less than three months out of the year of "normal" time. and it is true, you could never trust feeling good cause it was always going to come crashing down, you didnt know when, but it was always, always going to unravel on you. i would drive my t up the wall after i stabilized cause i would panic, "may is coming, may is coming, im going to get manic"........he never believed my cycle theory. (what did he know....i lived with myself for thirty years, he got to me after drugs...lol