HI Labyrinth --

I like your pseudnom. Welcome to the forums.

Like Ozzie says -- a therapist is a good place to start to talk things out and figure out a plan for what to do. You mention that you are a "senior." If you are a college senior, most colleges and universities have *free* counseling services on campus. You pay for them out of your various fees, so these are not a hand-out. I have found the people on campuses where I've worked have great understanding of what people that age are going through.

I honed in on 2 things in your message (which usually means those are things in me that I'm dealing with).

1. " have no self confidence, i have no self-esteem, i constantly need someone to help guide me, for i am afraid of being alone. now it isn't so bad, these past few weeks i feel more steady, but still shaky. i need guidance, i need to have some help as to what i can do to help myself. "

These are important statements to make about yourself. There is help. As Ozzie says, again, a therapist with whom you can develop a personal relationship. And don't be afraid to interview a few T's until you find one who seems to have the best approach for you.

2. You mention all the things that your BF said about you -- Labyrinthe is this way, L is that way, L needs to do this. There's an old saying -- Everytime you point the finger at someone else, there are three fingers pointing back at you. There doesn't seem to be a lot of introspection on your BF's part -- he is making you the "problem" in this life, but most of us plenty of our flaws going on that contribute to any difficulties we encounter in life.

Lastly, plz take anything I say here with a grain of salt. I'm not a therapist, and I'm on these forums bec. I am struggling with my own issues. Sometimes it helps to have people outside ourselves reflect thing back to us, but if you think to yourself -- No, Wants2Fly is so wrong, so wrong -- then I am probably am!

Good luck with all this and keep coming back.