good question!

it probably doesnt mean what i think it means. but what I personally interpret it as is - that i want to have to all this power and money and basically worldly power in life. mainly power. you know...secular things. but maybe through what my illness has given me signs that maybe thats not what i should be doing. that maybe in fact i should be triumphing in something religious or spiritual. idk.
idk that was my initial reponse to reading that line. when i read that line maybe 2 years ago or so.

but its weird because idk if im confusing nietzche with sartre in thinking that - that line probably has nothing to do with God or religion. but idk thats just what i personally got out of it initially. and then another thing - with it being philosophy i feel i need to think the line more thoroughly in its meaning rather than just whats verbally presented on the page.