As for therapy, I haven't been in months. I quit, back in September/October, after about 7 or 8 years. I did not quit in a good way. I sent my last check (we did phone sessions because I had started seeing her in one place before I moved somewhere farther away), and didn't set up another appointment. I feel bad, but I felt like I was done. Stagnant. Sick of therapy. I'm still kind of sick of it, when I think about it, even though it did help me greatly through some of the most difficult times of my life thus far. I'm not ungrateful.

It's hard for me to compress everything into a 45 minute session. Parts of my brain seem to go into hiding. I forget things that I've felt or experienced or perceived. And then they magically come back to me hours or a day or so afterwards. And then by the time the next session rolls around, we're talking about something we were discussing from the last session. Or sometimes, it's just hard for me to articulate, to find a starting point to even begin to explain without just vomiting words, and I just give up before I even begin.

My therapist attributed everything I did and felt to depression. But she also said I had "bipolar elements."

My psychiatrist has recommended someone he works in the same office with, and I think I might soon(ish) try to set up an appointment with her.