Wow. I'm sorry. That sounds like he was really unhelpful.

Honestly, if you're to the point that you're considering ending the relationship, it might be good to think through what you want from a T and what kind of boundaries will be most beneficial. For example, my T is very open. I can ask him all sorts of personal questions and he doesn't shy away (I ask my PDoc too LOL). It seems like he's struggling to figure out how to skillfully enforce his own boundaries. Factually speaking, from even a professional relationship standpoint it's a very normal thing to want to know what will happen when a baby is born. My husband had to notify his job for when both of our children were born and I had to plan months in advance myself. His vague not knowing is poor planning in his part.