i haven't had dbt, and i know its different from cbt - but in my experience i find most cognitive approaches invalidating because i feel like a lot of Ts are using it without 'meaning' it...

so, sometimes i had people in my life who would say the words, but what they really were interested in is me changing my experience, not accepting it and not believing that i'm doing the best i can at the moment...

that said, i learned a lot about how to cope and how to deal with SI triggers. how to distract myself. maybe in some ways how to invalidate myself lol - but at the end of the day this helped me get a level of stability that has helped me get a life. and i think was the first step for me - just building a foundation where the behaviors that were getting in the way could end.

not much help, but i wish you luck.