My hallucinations are getting worse. I used to only hear things once in a while and the sounds and voices that I was hearing sounded far away. The sounds and voices are becoming louder. However, I still can’t make out what they are saying. Last night I heard my husband pull up the driveway three times almost back to back in his car with the radio blaring. We have a pretty sound proof house (as we live next to an airport), so even if he did pull up, I don’t think that I would have heard it that loud.
Also, I have been seeing what I thought at first was my cat in different places in the house. He is a dark gray cat. Anyway, I have now discovered that they are dark shadows. These dark shadows have evolved into people shaped shadows that I am now seeing while I am driving or out of the corner of my eye when walking with someone.
I thought maybe this could be a spiritual thing. Meaning that I am seeing people from the afterlife and hearing them but am not quite in tune with them. Kind of like a stereo not on the right station. I am quite concerned, because I have also had this idea that my husband is wanting to leave me because I am having too many problems. It is not true, and I know this to some extent, but I am rationalizing my belief that he is going to leave me no matter how many times he tells me that he isn’t.
One of the issues that I also have is the fact that the hallucinations, (visual distortions-something else I have been having as well), and also some delusional thinking have all started basically about 6 months ago and I am almost 43 years old. I am bipolar and have been cycling a lot lately, but these symptoms have been happening no matter what mood I am in.
I keep explaining this to my pdoc, and she isn’t concerned. I am though. I’m getting paranoid and scared. Has anyone had a problem with patterns or bubbly lettering seeming like they are something other than they are and then irritating you so much that you have to cover it up or remove it from your presence?
Should I keep a log of all incidences that I am experiencing? I just want to know that others have experienced something similar.
Thank you. I know I have talked about this before, but it seems like it is getting worse. I am not experiencing things every day and multiple times per day.
Thanks again for reading this.
Spincera