Hello. I'm in the UK and I'm 17, I currently see a Community Nurse at the mental health service CAMHS (Child and Adult Mental Health Service) which is the free mental health service on the NHS.

I'll be turning 18 in July, which is only 6 months away. I'll give you guys some background about my experience with the service and then explain what I'm unsure on.

So I began by seeing a Clinical Child Psychologist about 3 years ago (due to an attempt at taking my own life). I saw her for about 6 months before I left because I was niave enough to think I was 'fine' and I didn't like the lady I was seeing. I then got back in touch with CAMHS and asked to see someone again (this was about a year later). I was then seeing a Clinical Nurse. Which went fine, she put me on a list to get assessed for depression. The psychologist who did the assessment had only seen me once, didn't ask about my history (just about my apetite, sleep and concentration) and then proceeded to tell me I was fine.

After talking more to this clinical nurse, I explained my issues with anxiety and such and she refferred me to speak to a lady who had experience with anxiety and would try doing CBT with me. Turns out she is a Community Nurse and has no experience with Anxiety and instead, after about 2 months of seeing her, told me should I had Aspergers Syndrome and got me to do an assessment.. where again they told me I was fine. All the while, I'm crying every night because no one is taking my issues with anxiety seriously.

Not one of these people have mentioned anxiety to me and not one has let me explain (except the clinical nurse).

My point is, first I was seeing a Psychologist because they thought I was 'serious' enough to see her. Then when I got back in touch - after a mental breakdown which included me getting drunk and blacking out and then hallucinating for the next 3 days, my mum got the doctor involved and then CAMHS - I was demoted to a clinical nurse, who did me a lot of good and helped me a fair bit. And now I'm seeing a community nurse.

This community nurse told me the Aspergers assessment came back as I was fine and all that was wrong was I had issues with relationships. Which I know. I didn't need a test for something I know I don't have to tell me that I have problems in certain areas. She then suggested that me and my mum and my brother come in for family therapy (WTF) because I feel alone and such. She didn't think to ask why I felt alone and assumed that it was because of my family - no. It's because I am too afraid to leave my room.

I appologise for the rant. I'm so terrified out of my mind. This community nurse also said that once I turn 18, because I don't have anything seriously wrong, I wouldn't qualify for Adult Psychiatric Services and so I'd be on my own. I could get in touch with this 16-21 service (that deals with 16 year old mothers and drug addicts...), which isn't going to happen.

I feel so belittled and that everything I went through prior to my suicide attempt (living with an abusive father a good few thousand miles across ocean without my mother, also being in a verbally and physically abusive relationship at the same time) has all been forgotten and that they aren't taking me seriously enough.

I don't know what to do? I don't have the money to go into private care and there aren't any insurance options we can afford. I'm so scared I'm going to be on my own. And I have mock A-Level exams next week which I don't think I'll be able to leave my house to actually do. I'm so scared. (and im sorry for the essay)