I feel the same way you do. From the outside looking in no one would know what I have been through and the emotional pain I face everyday. All my emotions are bottled up and I appear confident, stoic, and like I have it all together. I'm so self protective. Both of my parents have severe emotional problems and I was never allowed to be vulnerable or cry. I have always had to seem strong. I sometimes wish I could blurt out all of my issues and the loneliness I feel.