It dawned on me about 20 minutes ago that it is January 20something. The problem with that is my best friend's son had a birthday last week. Yeah, I was flying high on mania that day. She says we talked about it the day before. (I was flying high that day too, along with the day after. I don't remember. I could have redeemed myself last weekend when they went to the movies, except 1) i didn't even know the date, 2)i was so disconnected, I would not have made the connection even if I'd been aware of the date and 3) I remember being in the bed last weekend, crying and telling myself that i should probably get up. By Saturday, i was somewhere between a scattered messed and a pool of tears. She reminded me that I missed it last year too. Yeah, last year I was unmedicated, undiagnosed, taking an SSRI, and suicidal around the time of his birthday. "Sorry" feels like an excuse. Today WAS a good day. Crap. . .

And the difference between being "properly" medicated and not is what? . . .heck, obviously I was forgetting birthdays before having a pdoc and meds for BPI. Doesn't feel much like improved quality of life.