Do excuse my jumping in here, as I'm NOT ACOA. Just clicking past and wanted to read this.

I am an addict. (NA) I am also a mother, and HAVE parents.

I went to rehab in 2011, and gave my daughter to my Mumma. Was just getting sorted out and planning to have my baby back, when I almost died in a bad bad car accident and *I* left hospital and went home to MY mum.

I was just well enough mid last year, and planned to have my baby move in with me. My daughter decided she didn't want to move in with me. So my Mum and Dad are parenting her full time now.

Things got tense with both me and my Mum mothering my little girl. Somehow we grew into a new dynamic, and I am now the Big Sister, and I let Mum alone do the parenting.

So my daughter and I are kinda in the 'equal' pattern now. I don't have to enforce veggies, bedtimes, curfews, whatnot. Just try and set a good example.

When I was really broken after the accident, (was able to do about what a 2 year old could do) and couldn't feed or dress myself, my daughter stepped up quite a bit and did my hair, grabbed stuff I needed (wheelchair) and couldn't reach.

Now we interact on a far more adult base. I do try and make sure I don't put too much on her, because she is 10yo. Just a kid. I do however, need her. We are close, and I make sure our relationship is happy, and close, and she knows she can depend on me for anything she needs.

She talks to me more like a sister now, and shares more than she probably would've before when I was being Mum. Now that MY Mum is mothering her, and I am not in that parent role, she seems able to share more. It's really silly, because I am exactly the same, I just don't need to pull her up on her behaviour, or do mum kinda things.

I do need her though. I don't think I would wanna live without her. It was horrid finding out she wanted to stay with my Mum. I almost died. They say that losing a child (dying) is the worst thing ever. Whereas parents are expected to die first.

I am very close with my Mum. I need her a lot. I cannot imagine my life without either of them. <3