Augustana, that sounds very much like how I got started too. It's better if you can stop now, and I'm glad to read that you are working with a therapist. Wanting to hurt yourself in any way means that you have emotions that you aren't dealing with effectively and you're avoiding them. See if you can find out what those feelings are, and learn a way to address them in a way that you will feel better about. You can also examine what you are getting out of hurting yourself (it may be more than one thing, but I'll guarantee it is something) and find other ways to get whatever it is that you are needing. I know it's not so easy, but it will be easier now than after you have settled in to this habit.

TC,
Rap