I've been up since 6am. It's 6:50 now. I went to sleep around 11pm. Only an hour less than 8 but still. There is nothing wrong with me. I'm tired of taking these meds. I want to clean, but my spouse is still asleep. I feel like I'm going to throw up. My mother in law and I had a disagreement at Bible study yesterday. It's messing with my head a bit. I'm obsessing. Racing thoughts. This can't be happening. I'm not bipolar. Maybe I should go for a walk. Focus is shot. I've been writing this for over a half hour. I want to crawl outta my skin. Can't sit still. Now I want to delete this because everything is different. I'm cold. Gotta plan my garden for this year. Container garden. Gotta figure out how to keep neighbors cats out of it this year. I'm tired of taking pills. But I'll never be able to stop one of them. Thank you cancer. I just want to fix this. I have no control over my thoughts or my life any more. Everything is on its own timing and nothing lines up. I don't feel happy well overly happy. I'm more agitated. The sun isn't even up yet and now I've been writing this for an hour. Crap....