I'm really stressed out, overwhelmed and anxious. My mind is swamped with ED. It is swamped with numbers, calories, weights and images. I suffer with severe gastroparesis and its really flaring up. I developed GP as a direct result of my ED. I've been anorexic since I was 9 years old. I'm currently 41 and was diagnosed with the GP in 2005. It's extreemly painful to eat anything and it fuels my ED immensly. Once my weight drops below a certain point it's ike I've reached the point of no return. My mind just gets sicker and sicker and and more twisted. I become completely irrational. Despite the numerous hospitaizations for weight stabialization I have difficulty being able to utilize any of the tools to stay balanced. I'm so sick of dealing with this disease and fighting it. I am also so terrified to live without it because it's always been there. My anxiety and stress is so high currently. I feel lost and angry at myself and the disease and for allowing to rule my life.

Any suggestions????