Maybe it isn't that you dislike her or don't love her so much as that there is an awkwardness between you that makes things feel hard rather than naturally easy.

I mean... I prefer to think of love as... Being there. Putting food on the table and being there day in and day out. To think of love as some feeling that you get... Well... An awful lot of relationships go south when they try and base things on that.

It sounds like it is weighing on your mind that you might be hurting her... That sounds like a concern from love rather than hate, or dislike, to me.

I wonder if she might be a little Asperger's, or something like that. Whether she might be more... Peaceful. Quiet. Thoughtful. Is she one of those 'wise beyond their years' very sensitive children? I'd imagine that dynamic to be much harder than a kid who is more... Cheery. Funny. Giggly. Etc. That pleasure for her might be very low key. Subtle. It might be harder to read when she is happy vs uncomfortable.

Maybe... The thing is to try and bond with her by spending time with her... Figuring out stuff that you both like. What do you have in common? It might be that she feels more comfortable with her Father because guys are a bit more into activities rather than chattering. Though it is hard to say, I attached more to my Father... Does she like nature stuff?

I guess... I'd be thinking that I want my daughter to feel like they can come to me if things are hard for them. If they need to cry about their day, or whatever. And... I'd want to do stuff with them to make sure that they were positive about themselves. Encouraging of themselves etc. To help model that good self talk for them so they would internalise it. Doing those sorts of things... Is demonstrating love, if anything is, I reckon.

She might be sad because of... Something. I don't know.

I don't have kids so I don't know about that bonding feeling. ONe of my old keyworkers used to work in maternity mental health, though, mostly with post-natal depression. She said that there were quite a few women who felt upset that they didn't feel bonded or connected to their kids. That they were so very exhausted once they were born that they simply didn't have anything left to give to them... And that they felt immense guilt about that... She did what she did precisely to help intervene and help things much earlier...

I don't know who you should ask for help, exactly, but I am pretty sure that there are people out there who can help you. Kudos for taking the first step.