You can do all of those things without lying: You are already a man who looks mysteriously like someone from the Mediterranean and speaks fluent Castellano flawlessly, but is actually American (sorry, can't change this for you). Now meet and make some Latinos friends, they are a lot of fun!! Enjoy their rich culture of delicious mojitos and sexy, sultry Latin dance. Meet a beautiful Latin woman in dance class, fall in love and have two gorgeous daughters with dark hair and caramel skin. It is do able.