Perhaps being loving to her reminds you of being loving to yourself.

What thoughts and feelings does loving myself bring to mind? Perhaps loving yourself is very hard for you to do.

How you see yourself might be something to explore with a therapist--and I do encourage you to start seeing a therapist.

To find a therapist, you can look at this website, for example:

Psychotherapy Practitioner Directory - Good Therapy Australia

You can talk on the phone to some that look appropriate, and/or see a few for a session and find out who seems to understand you best and who you feel most comfortable speaking with.

Here are a few possibilities:

You could simply say you are looking for a therapist and the T will engage with you and guide the discussion.

You could tell them what is bothering you: It really troubles me that I dislike one of my daughters. A good T will know how to talk further about it.

You could print out one or both your posts here and show them to the therapist(s) you speak with.

You could ask the Ts you contact, they will know.