I had death wishes when I was 10, and fell into my first clinical depression at 13. Of course no one was diagnosing kids with mental illnesses back then, but I was taken to different doctors who put me on pills that made me nauseated, tired, or wired. I suppose they were antidepressants. Eventually I climbed out of the pit and the drugs went away. But I think that was the beginning of my bipolar illness.