Quote:
Originally Posted by quasicrystalline
I'm new to this, but my current counselor has encouraged me to make a list of the things that make me manic. The biggest one for me is sleep. There's usually a week or two period where I still can sleep at a normal time, like by midnight if I force myself, but I'll WANT to stay up later. It seems like when I start giving into that is when the mood trips up even higher.
I made a habit of writing most of my college papers during all nighters the day before it was due. Part in procrastination, part in I kind of enjoyed the thrill and adrenaline rush of pushing through it. Pretty sure I was pushing myself into hypomania now, but then I had no idea what I was doing to myself.
Another one is the compulsion to write. I love writing and want to be a writer, and all of a sudden, especially if I had been in the block, the words just pour out of me effortlessly.
I can identify with book binging too. Any kind of binge, really. I taught myself to crochet in one evening during high school, and then I later taught myself to knit during a similar state of mind. I've always had my "things" and "phases," I guess!
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I cannot tell you how much I identify with almost everything you wrote (minus the crochet -- for me it was beading, and then drawing and painting, both of which I miss but can't seem to get up enough motivation to do either, for some reason).
But the procrastination thing? Holy eff, yes.
And the writing thing? Oh my god yes. I go through dry periods, and then periods where I just can't stop.
I do book bingeing and music bingeing, more music bingeing lately.
Instead of staying up late, I wind up waking up at 4 or 5, like clockwork, even if I've only gotten 4 or 5 hours of sleep. My body's just like "Okay! Time to go!"
It's nice to be able to identify like this, since I'm all sorts of confused about what's going on with me. Thank you.