I don't know why you are so concerned about what your brothers think....their thoughts or at least the one you quoted are NOT MAINSTREAM US beliefs.....they are their own personal way of looking at things.

My father was 27 years old, my mother was 19 when they got married & that was back in the 1940's during WWII. It's actually normal for older men to date & marry younger women in the US.....it's less acceptable for older women to date younger men than it is for older men to date & marry younger women......that has actually been the NORM for longer than I can ever remember....so I honestly don't know where you are getting your facts from other than what your brother says because he's NOT getting it from the normal society in the US.

Shoot, look at the marriage of George Cloony to Amal Alamuddin....he's 53 & she's 37......& no one even batted an eye at their age difference....so I'm not sure where you are getting your thinking from other than the comment that your brother made which IS NOT mainstream US society thinking.

Sounds like you have more anger to what your life was like & that you didn't have the confidence to date when you were younger because of problems you were dealing with of being different in a way that others noticed.....sounds like you might not actually be out of that shell you said you felt like you were in during college & it sounds like you might need some professional help to deal with those things of your past so that you can come into your OWN being in the NOW & process the past so that you can leave it there & get on with your own life.....sounds like your problems are more with other internal issues than they are with dating a younger woman.