Thanks Angelique67, I wish cyber hugs were real. But I appreciate anyone who listens and understands. I'm not in a huggy mood. I keep up with everyone here, but sometimes I don't know how many more cyber hugs I want myself. I'd like a real one, I'm sure you do to with being alone. I hope the storm passes and you are safe. I hope my dad is ok tonight with going out. He smoked for much of his life. I never blame him for that. I smoke myself still, until there's less stress.
He was blessed. He had a grapefruit sized tumor back in 88, and survived without chemo or anything else. It was so shocking to see, the scar was so wide, across the back under his shoulder blade, they broke ribs... the tube draining.. his pain.. I should have known better myself to stop smoking. I guess I always loved the smell of smoke because he was the more peaceful of my parents. I can still remember him carrying me up our long laneway, with snow up to his knees, after church.