One question I have: Is the mother always leaving you out of the loop? I ask this because there is a difference between her purposely not telling you, versus forgetting to tell you.

If she is a forgetful person, is bad at keeping people updated on their lives, and is consistently a person who is disorganized or all over the place, then just casually bring it up with her. Be like "hey I heard your child won an award and met ____, that's cool! How did that happen?" If she hasn't been purposely excluding you from the news, she would probably happily fill you in with the details of what happened. (trust me, my best friend is like this...when I remind her of things she will be like "OH YEA, xyz happened last weekend....and go trailing on.)

However, if what I mentioned above is not true and you have a sense that she purposely wants to exclude you, maybe you can ask yourself "why do you want to be included in her life so much?" I understand if it's because you are close to the child, but if you aren't close to the mother of this child, she would have little reason to keep you updated on her kid's life.

I know it feels sucky to be the "last one to know." Some people don't do it on purpose. But if you're really concerned about not being a priority in this person's life, maybe it's time to re-evaluate your relationship with them. Has it be a toxic one? Have there been occasions where you asked for something and she responded in a defensive manner? She might suggest things like you are being "too pushy." If you ever hear this kind of language, it is best to give them their space and try not take it too much to heart.