Welll..... This is embarassing.

I've never been comfortable with sex really. I do have good reason I guess (early sexual abuse), but as an adult this has made me feel really inferior.

I've had sex with different partners, but I rarely enjoy it. It not that I never enjoy it. Lately, I'm getting comfortable enough with my husband that I'm learning to be more comfortable, but this is all new for me. Its not all the time either. I have to be very relaxed in order to "let go"

Sex has always equalled shame for me. I get this awful burning anxious feeling most of the time I am intimate.

What makes me feel really bad is I have always faked orgasms. I guess to make the guy feel better about it. I've only recently ever had an orgasm.

I feel shameful even talking about this. I'm not sure why I am talking about this.