It is a cycle that follows the same path. My first husband was the same in ways, but so much worse. I don't know what to do other than to just keep on from day to day. It's the loneliness that is the worst. I have no one I can turn to or talk to. I have no family left that cares. My gran passed this year and she was the only one who had contacted me since my mom died. At 27 no one should have to be this alone. I'm thankful for this community. At least now there is somewhere to get this off of my mind. It gets harder to pretend that everything is alright at work.