Quote:
Originally Posted by d.o.a.
This is probably going to sound sad, but I thought that since I'm paying her, she must listen to me - I was so certain no one would out of their own free will - that's how worthless I've felt because my parents didn't accept and love me as I was. Paying her also meant she couldn't turn me away 'when she got bored of me'.
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I have a story that would make you reconsider this idea that "just because we pay our therapists, they must listen to us."
I had a therapist that I was only able to go to for four visits. She was amazing. Understood why I felt oppressed/trapped at home and why I wanted my independence and freedom so much... She also knew I had just started working and that I was shelling out money out-of-pocket to see her since that's how my employer's medical insurance worked. On the fourth visit, I told her how I had gotten into multiple intense arguments with my family about my coming to see her and that today was going to be my last appointment. That session ran overtime by almost 30 minutes, and at the end I wrote her a check for the usual amount.
Here is the part that really flabbergasts me. She still has yet to cash that final check from my bank account. At first I thought she was just waiting until the end of the month to deposit it, but it has been over two months already. My medical insurance even sent me a receipt documenting that I had paid for four visits.
I like to believe she did that out of the kindness of her own heart. She understood how hard it was for me to fight the stigma my parents had against me seeking mental health services.