I think I'm going to, but getting up the courage is hard. For one thing I feel really guilty that I didn't follow all their advice (especially dropping out of the program when EVERYBODY knew I wasn't ready). And besides that, I doubt they'd want to re-admit me, seeing as how they had limited space and since I'm not underweight or malnourished, I'm not going to be a priority.

Honestly right now I'm in that place where I want to get really sick again before I get help just so that I feel like I deserve help.