Thanks. It's nice to hear that someone understands though I'm sorry too for you having such bad experiences.

I have in the past been willing and open about my past, but I learned that hard way that sometimes people you think would be most understanding in fact take it as a problem and mark you so that if anything else comes up they see it more problematically than it should be. This teacher has a high opinion of me and seems to be a very sensitive clinician, but even so I am not taking any risks that are not necessary. I'm not with clients that have this issue or I would do something different. In fact my clients while they may have trauma backgrounds it is not anything we are supposed to approach because it would destabilize them. Their psychotic symptoms and then the anxiety and depression of their responses to that and to their situations is the thing I work on with them. The only way they are affected is that some of my energy is now wrapped up more in myself. And for me this is the right time to deal with this material as much as possible. I have already felt release from doing a segment of the work. I am in a good enough place generally that I can sink a bit to do this and still end up floating.