Thanks for your reply. I do not see a psychiatrist. I've been trying to find one in my area that will take me in as a patient, but without insurance, and very little money it seems hopeless. I did break down and see my family physician, told him my sx's. He prescribed depakote, but now I'm afraid to take it. He also prescribes me a low dose of Xanax, but I very rarely take it, since it doesn't really help my anxiety, only helps me to sleep occasionally. I think I might be in a mixed episode. I have a lot of paranoia, impulsiveness, delusions, and occasional hallucinations. I find it very difficult to understand my symptoms and where they fit into the different facets of this dx, but they do scare me knowing how destructive they can be.