Uhm, ok, you admit to having a personality disorder, and I was guessing which one based on your posts. Again, I am not projecting, rather I am seeing that your "me me me" behavior is very typical of a narcissist. My narcissistic grandfather was the same way. He thought that everyone should throw themselves under the bus to put up with his bad behavior, and if they didn't then they were the ones with the problem; they were the ones who were "weak".

I'm not surprised that others cannot see this behavior in you. It really does take someone with direct and prolonged exposure to a narcissist to see it in other people. And yes, I realize that everyone will say I am "projecting", but no, I am not. Every single past life experience taints every future experience, so in that regard, we all "project" in everything that we say and do. There is no such thing as being a "blank slate" ever.

If you really think that your behavior is OK, and that everyone should put up with you no matter what, then you will be in for future heartache. I have PTSD and I know all too well what it feels like to be abandoned. However, I'm not so delusional as to think that everyone should stick by me no matter what. I have been sectioned, had the cops threatened on me, had homelessness threatened, and so on.....Long/short, people shouldn't be expected to put up with bad behavior. If you surround yourself with people who accept such bad behavior, then what is your motivation to change? The harsh reality of possibly being alone, homeless, and freedom-less was more than enough motivation to change.

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but support doesn't always come in the form of coddling.