A letter to myself to help me get over this down moment of depression.

I am so depressed. I want to just cry and cry. There isn't even a friggin reason for it, so I think up stuff to be sad about that normally doesn't bother me.

I am angry that no one cares I am sad. (my husband cares, but I am taking him for granted at the moment because nothing he can say or do helps) Its my choice to isolate so the fact that I have no relationship with my family is no ones fault! So, I am sad it is pointless to even get angry.

I love everyone in here at psych central, because I know if some people do read this, and you really don't have to its just a vent. I am angry at everyone for not responding to some other posts or comments I made. No one cares about me. -- guess what Imah, no one does care, and even though they kind of care, like is about taking care of ourselves and not expecting other people to take care of us.

I am so lonely. I remember yesterday (even earlier today NOT being lonely) frigging just depressed because of the bipolar.

Man are we lucky we know the reason we have these mood swings. Yay for being lucky.

But really, before I understood it was the bipolar making me nuts like this, I actually blamed the things I thought up.

Its just the bipolar, and all the running away from it I can do - avoiding, talking, cleaning, sleeping - it doesn't make it go away. Yes it does. With time it will. Oh, shut up you stupid optimist, I hate it when you don't allow me to be sad when I feel sad. You stfu yourself, you need the optimistic side of yourself that will help you get through this.

Yay, I have an illness, I reached out. I am releasing some tension. Pats self on back. F.U. self. I am just sad.

-----------------> IMAH <------------------