Quote:
Originally Posted by AzulOscuro
Yesterday, I was talking with a friend (an avoidant) about childhood.
Her childhood, on the contrary to mine, was horrible.
She knew soon what being an outsider meant. It's sad. Children shouldn't suffer for anything.
I, on the contrary, was a normie. Yes, I can say that there was a part of my life when I was a normal person.
The only strange thing that I can remember from my childhood is that I was very reluctant to give my grandad a kiss. He was so carefull but I wasn't able to see a man like this bc my dad was the oppossite. Distant, serious...
I have these memories fixed in my mind bc I really wanted to show my grandad carefull but I didn't daré to do it.
I'm curious to know how was your childhood.
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First I would like to say that your childhood can be "normal", but you will develop AvPD because all the treatment you get from parents and peers will not be interpreted by your brain as a "normal" persons brain would. My guess is that yours was more genetics while your friends was less genetics and more upbringing.
Mine was generally "normal", except for heavy criticism from my father and mother. My father and my sister ganging up on me and teasing me. My parents being busy with work not being too close to me.
Any form of compliments were awkward to me. Any form of care, love and attention my aunt gave me when I was staying with them was also weird to me. She worried whether I did my homework and helped me with it... my parents just left me to deal with it by myself. They didn't care if I clipped my nails or took a shower. They only cared if I held a broom the "right way", when I did not, they got upset, criticized me and yelled at me. When I didn't do things like they wanted, they always had something to say about that.
My dreams are still plagued by all this. I dream about being criticized by my father. There are of course other things like children in gym class criticizing me for not being able to play Basketball.