It's been a few days. I'm still waiting to balance. Not sure if i'm up or down or both. Not sure which dx is affecting me the most right now. Not sure if it's still the side effects of missing meds one night earlier this week. My father died 31 years ago yesterday. My T and i worked on that monday. She says 3-5 days. Day 6 since we worked on it. Day 7 since the episode (PTSD -- wrong forum) Some people feel sad years later. I'm not sure what they think behind their sadness.
I'm beginning to get a cold. Maybe it's physical. Nothing seems to be pulling me out of this. I'm irritable, disconnected, sensitive to light, sound, touch, people. I feels like life is piling up on top of me. want to stay in bed today. I've been invited to a party. Why did I say yes? Cancellations don't make for good friendships. I don't know if I should go. I was told on Thursday (when I forced myself to go to a Small group/class) when I'm not happy, I change the chemistry of the room. I sat there. I didn't talk. A lot of people didn't talk.
I don't know which Rx is causing it but for the last month or so, at times i've felt like I'm trembling under my skin. I don't think people can see it. I don't like it. I see my T tomorrow. She will say it's just feelings -- divorce, life changes, anniversary of a traumatic event. I feel like it's all too much. Should probably go for a walk. I'm too tired, don't feel like getting up.
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"I knew who I was this morning, but I've changed a few times since then." ~Lewis Carroll
Bipolar I
PTSD
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