I keep hearing this and wondering myself. I mean people I've encountered in my life were clearly NOT doing their best, not even close. How can you say that neglectful or abusive parents are doing their best? or that an envious colleague who damages your career is doing their best? That is just nonsense. It seems to be a rather low level truism said to make people feel better when it just invalidates real pain and validates bad behavior.

Face it, there are people out there who are mean, aggressive, selfish, and often can't see it or don't care if they do. We do not live in a healthy world or a safe world. While it helps to be able to be accepting of limitations, that does not mean that we can't have negative responses to negative things.

It would be great if people truly were doing their best. We perhaps wouldn't need therapy then.